When You're Where You Need to Be

I've been fairly sick with this bad cold that's been going around. I stopped off at my local to have a Hot Toddy before heading home to relax and get some sleep. Always a wonderful conversation with the owner, another gentleman came in and we started to chat. He was a few years old than I am, married, and also an ESL teacher, though he'd gone into the JET program. We had some really interesting conversation regarding socio-economic status (he was born and raised in Miami) and how the perception of where you were brought up - it can have a direct impact on how you're received/perceived as an adult.

But to the point - we were discussing our significant others and he asked if I had any children. I told him no. He asked if I wanted any. I told him not really, but I likely couldn't have them anyway. He got quiet and said: "my wife and I went through IVF three times. It didn't work". I looked at him and said: "I'm sorry. I cannot imagine how difficult that must have been for you and your wife, both separately and together." No pity, just compassion. He unexpectedly started to tear up. "I didn't realize I needed to hear that. No one, not even my own mom... Thank you. That... I feel so much better now." We sat in relative silence, both of us processing the moment. "I'm glad I was able to help you through that - however brief." "I was only going to come in for one drink, but we started talking and..." "Yeah. I know." He asked if he could hug me and I obliged. Then he left.

As clergy, our work isn't always going to be within our faith circles. It isn't always going to be at church or in Temple or Sabbats and Esbats. It's when we ride the train, or when we're waiting in line for groceries. It's in how we interact with the people around us. Our friends and family. Are you obnoxious to the barista who is only trying to make your drink, in addition to the likely 20 others that they have in line? Or are you kind and compassionate? Do you put yourself in others' shoes?

I firmly believe that when the Work needs to be done - Spirit/Deity will put you where you need to be. It's our responsibility to be open to the Work that the Gods need us to do. I didn't think I was doing anything particularly of note, simply offering compassion for someone who had been through a difficult life transition. But sometimes - what we would perceive as insignificant - someone else may see as life-changing.

Even if it's in a bar on a rainy October evening.